I have tried meditation before on the odd occasion, such as at the end of a yoga lesson, but I have never tried to meditate regularly, and it was something I was keen to try as there are so many scientific studies that have shown the benefits of regular meditation.
Scientific studies on meditation have shown that it can have a positive effect on happiness and other positive emotions, lessen anxiety and depression, lower stress and even improve physical health. Measuring brain activity during and after meditation shows increased activity in the left side of the brain, and there is even evidence that meditating regularly can actually change the brain. Regular meditation can increase grey matter in the brain, increase cortical thickness in the hippocampus (which is responsible for memory and learning) and decrease volume in the amygdala (which is the part of the brain which is responsible for fear, stress and anxiety).
With that evidence, it really seemed like I should give it a go, but where to start?
There are lots of different types of meditation and ways to go about it - one of the most accessible ways to start is to use an app on your smartphone or download a guided meditation from the internet, so this looked like a good place to start.
I started by trying out Headspace and Calm - two well-known meditation apps that I had seen advertised. Both have some free meditations and resources, but then other content that you can pay for. In the last week I have tried the beginner's sessions on both apps.
So what have I found so far ?
1) Evening is not the right time for me to meditate - I fall asleep!
Ok, so maybe I should have tried sitting on a chair as instructed, not sitting up in bed, but after dozing off a couple of times I got the message.
Looking at what other people have written about meditation, it's important to pick a time that's right for you. Some people meditate in the morning to clear their mind before a busy day, some people like to meditate before they sleep. Clearly I hadn't quite got the distinction between 'before' and 'sleeping' so it looks like I might need to find a time earlier in the day.
2) It's not that easy to do.
The basic idea behind meditation is that you are trying to focus your attention one one thing (in the meditations I was trying to do, this was paying attention to your breath) and not letting your thoughts wander. I found it was a bit like trying to put a large octopus in a small string bag. After the first couple of days I was feeling more frustrated than I started.
I even tried a local drop in meditation session ran by my local Kaddampa Buddhists led by a lovely warm lady called Anne. It was an interesting evening, but the focus was on buddhist teaching, and although she spoke a lot of sense about the evening's topic of anxiety, I really wanted help with how to do meditation, not a new spiritual direction in life.
So I went back to the drawing board and did a bit of reading and googling to see what the experts had to say. What I found out gave me encouragement Firstly, even the experts have good and bad days. Secondly, it doesn't matter if your mind does wander. You just notice that thought, then gently bring your mind back to your focus. And lastly, it's like running. When you start, you can't expect to run a marathon the first time. You start with a few minutes at a time and build it up. You will get fitter if you run regularly.
So I came back to my meditation apps and I am going to persist and keep meditating for a few minutes every day . I will see how it goes over the next month. Hopefully I can stay awake long enough to find out.
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