Today I was thinking about what I have learnt from my puppy, and definitely the first thing is the need to have patience with her.
Today I am feeling frustrated because it appears that at the moment, I have a puppy that doesn't much like walking! The first time I took her out, it took us 25 minutes to cover a couple of hundred yards. Everything had to be sniffed and examined, looked at and investigated. I thought that was to be expected on the first walk, but a week later and after several trips out to various places, it is still much the same.
This morning we spent fifteen minutes and got about a hundred yards, with her being carried for part of it as I felt so frustrated. When we turned round to come home however, she scampered along quite nicely, so we have both come home to think this thing through.
The fact that she is happier to come home rather than walk out makes me think she is still just a bit nervous of the outside world. I guess I just need to persevere with short walks and taking her out often and I will build up her confidence.
So why did I feel so frustrated this morning? In the first couple of weeks I mopped up wees and poos in the house with plenty of patience. Now that she is making good progress towards being house trained, she is trying our patience by chewing everything she can get her paws on. So I am happily prying her jaws open several times a day to remove some small plastic object which she has somehow managed to get hold of. That is a little frustrating, but hey, she's teething, we can deal with it. So why do I feel so frustrated with the fact that she won't just come out the door and walk?
It is of course, because of my expectations. One of the main reasons that I wanted a dog was because I love walking. Walking is like meditation to me, I love being outside absorbing the sights and sounds of nature around me. I love the rhythm of movement, letting my thoughts flow and eddy around me. It makes me feel really good.
So I wanted a walking buddy. Someone who can come with me to enjoy the great outdoors, or even just meandering through the town, people watching as we go. When I was younger, my grandfather looked after a golden labrador called Clare, and we used to roam around the fields near my grandparents' house together. When I daydream about the happiest parts of my childhood, I am sitting on a bank in a field in the Cotswolds in the sun watching the clouds drift by. And often, leaning against me is the heavy bulk of Clare, smelling a bit doggy and panting slightly as we watch the clouds together.
So, back to today and to a little dog that is now crashed out by my feet as I type. She is of course a small puppy. We aren't quite ready for big adventures just yet, but we will get there. I just need to have a little more patience.
Tuesday 29 September 2015
Tuesday 22 September 2015
The ultimate decluttering device - get a puppy.
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| The ultimate declutterer? |
Three weeks ago, we acquired a new 10 week old Cockapoo puppy. We had been considering getting a dog for quite a while, and having investigated different dog breeds, we had concluded that the family friendly gentle nature of a Cockapoo would suit us. Plus, we hoped she wouldn't try and eat the rabbit like a terrier would.
Having decided on a dog a while ago and having researched the breed, the next question was timing. We had a holiday planned in the summer, so I figured I could start looking as soon as we returned. A few days after we got back, I started the puppy hunt on Pets4homes, and found a gorgeous looking litter of black cockapoos about an hours drive from us. After exchanging emails and phone calls with the breeder, during which time we both decided the other sounded a responsible adult with high standards of puppy welfare, we eventually met and chose our puppy. Suddenly, after months of thinking about it and planning, we were about to become proud new puppy parents!
Great excitement, followed by the realisation that we needed to puppy proof our house. The day before we got her I found the previously lacking motivation to sort out the boot room at the back of the house. I both tidied and reorganised things so I could move the cat's food and bed up onto the counter in the utility to give her a safe haven out of the puppy's reach. In the rest of the house I have had to ensure that nothing is left on the floor or within easy reach. My pile of clothes that accumulates on a chair beside my bed is now scooped up on a regular basis and tidied away in case she gets hold of something precious. I once lived with a puppy that converted one of my handbags into a clutch bag, so I am taking no chances. The puppy was fairly quiet for the first few days, but now she has been with us for 3 weeks and well settled in she is trying to chew everything. I spend my days roaming the house with eagle eye trying to detect small tasty objects before she does, and wrestling them out a mouth full of needle sharp teeth when she gets there first.
The most exciting moment came after we had her a couple of days and my teenage daughter announced that she was going to tidy her room so that the puppy could come in to play. The carpet, once lost to view under a layer of teenage detritus was excavated and even hoovered. So in a few days our bouncy small bundle of fur achieved more than years of effort by a nagging mother.
So a puppy as a decluttering tool? Has its benefits - but she's not completely housetrained yet, so I think on balance she may create more chaos than we have achieved by tidying up. But our home is a bit tidier and more organised, and certainly a lot more fun!
Monday 14 September 2015
Starting to clear the clutter
So I've decided to clear the clutter. Again. This isn't the first time I've tried to simplify things, so how do I go about it in a way that's more long lasting?
I love psychology, self help books and reading about how other people approach things in life. That's one of the reasons I started this blog, to join in the discussion rather than just watch from the sidelines. So I decided a good place to start on my quest to declutter would be to look for a good book on decluttering. Seeing as I'm not buying things I thought of heading to the library to see what I could find , but I decided to take a look on Amazon first. Although I wasn't intending to buy, the customer reviews were a good place to work out which books were useful, then I could use the online library catalogue to search for and reserve books. 'No More Clutter' by Sue Kay caught my eye and as they don't have a copy a my library, I have placed a reservation.
On looking further through the library catalogue, there seemed to be quite a few books about organising and decluttering available in my local library, so I headed down to see what I could find on the shelves. I discovered a wonderful gem of a book, 'The Clutter Cure' by Judi Culbertson. Rather than starting by focusing on how to declutter she instead starts by addressing the reasons why objects are meaningful to us, and why we find it so hard to let things go. I am already aware that we find it hard to let go of things because we perceive them to have value, or they have a sentimental attachment to them, or the person who gave them to us, but I have still found it hard to ignore those feelings at times. My particular weakness is that I can't bear to throw away something that might have a use for someone else. This makes it easy for me to sort through my clothes, because I can take the things I don't want to Oxfam where they will be sold and the money will go to fighting poverty, but really hard to get rid of something could be useful to someone else, but I don't know what to do with. This explains why a perfectly good but enormously large TV which has been sitting in our dining room for the last two months since we moved it out of another room to make space for an office for my husband. It's incredibly heavy as well as enormously large, and in the era of cheap flat screen TVs, I can't imagine anyone else wanting it, but I just can't bear to take it to the dump.
In the first few chapters of 'The Clutter Cure', Judi somehow manages to pinpoint all the sticking points as to why it's hard to let things go, and then gently chip away at them with both sensitivity and logic, to the point where it suddenly seems easy to let things go. By the time I was two chapters in, I was raring to go, and attacked my clothes drawers in the bedroom. Out went the 'useful' white T shirts which I don't wear any more and I don't feel good in. Out went the two 'useful' cardigans I hadn't worn for ages and a silk scarf I was given for a works event decades ago that I never wear. I also ditched the dresses that are a bit big on me since I lost weight last year and the lovely Joules dress that I bought from a charity shop and have worn once, but doesn't really fit right and it isn't really me. Yes, maybe I shouldn't have bought it in the first place, but it's cluttering up my wardrobe and now that it's gone, I'm not being reminded that I made a bad buy and feeling guilty that I've not worn it more.
That was yesterday evening, and today I've managed to sort through the large bookcase in our sitting room, and free up six bags of books and a bag of DVDs which can also go to Oxfam. I've got a slight sticking point on some books that are too scruffy for Oxfam and some magazines that someone else might like to read, but we have a festival starting in our village next week and there is a 'swap and swish' event where people can bring along things they don't need to give away, so I have bagged them up ready for that. I've also managed to sort and clean the shelves in my kitchen with my cookery books on, and freed up a few cookery books that I no longer use.
A great start, but now I'm exhausted, so it's time to stop and plan what to tackle next!
I love psychology, self help books and reading about how other people approach things in life. That's one of the reasons I started this blog, to join in the discussion rather than just watch from the sidelines. So I decided a good place to start on my quest to declutter would be to look for a good book on decluttering. Seeing as I'm not buying things I thought of heading to the library to see what I could find , but I decided to take a look on Amazon first. Although I wasn't intending to buy, the customer reviews were a good place to work out which books were useful, then I could use the online library catalogue to search for and reserve books. 'No More Clutter' by Sue Kay caught my eye and as they don't have a copy a my library, I have placed a reservation.
On looking further through the library catalogue, there seemed to be quite a few books about organising and decluttering available in my local library, so I headed down to see what I could find on the shelves. I discovered a wonderful gem of a book, 'The Clutter Cure' by Judi Culbertson. Rather than starting by focusing on how to declutter she instead starts by addressing the reasons why objects are meaningful to us, and why we find it so hard to let things go. I am already aware that we find it hard to let go of things because we perceive them to have value, or they have a sentimental attachment to them, or the person who gave them to us, but I have still found it hard to ignore those feelings at times. My particular weakness is that I can't bear to throw away something that might have a use for someone else. This makes it easy for me to sort through my clothes, because I can take the things I don't want to Oxfam where they will be sold and the money will go to fighting poverty, but really hard to get rid of something could be useful to someone else, but I don't know what to do with. This explains why a perfectly good but enormously large TV which has been sitting in our dining room for the last two months since we moved it out of another room to make space for an office for my husband. It's incredibly heavy as well as enormously large, and in the era of cheap flat screen TVs, I can't imagine anyone else wanting it, but I just can't bear to take it to the dump.
In the first few chapters of 'The Clutter Cure', Judi somehow manages to pinpoint all the sticking points as to why it's hard to let things go, and then gently chip away at them with both sensitivity and logic, to the point where it suddenly seems easy to let things go. By the time I was two chapters in, I was raring to go, and attacked my clothes drawers in the bedroom. Out went the 'useful' white T shirts which I don't wear any more and I don't feel good in. Out went the two 'useful' cardigans I hadn't worn for ages and a silk scarf I was given for a works event decades ago that I never wear. I also ditched the dresses that are a bit big on me since I lost weight last year and the lovely Joules dress that I bought from a charity shop and have worn once, but doesn't really fit right and it isn't really me. Yes, maybe I shouldn't have bought it in the first place, but it's cluttering up my wardrobe and now that it's gone, I'm not being reminded that I made a bad buy and feeling guilty that I've not worn it more.
That was yesterday evening, and today I've managed to sort through the large bookcase in our sitting room, and free up six bags of books and a bag of DVDs which can also go to Oxfam. I've got a slight sticking point on some books that are too scruffy for Oxfam and some magazines that someone else might like to read, but we have a festival starting in our village next week and there is a 'swap and swish' event where people can bring along things they don't need to give away, so I have bagged them up ready for that. I've also managed to sort and clean the shelves in my kitchen with my cookery books on, and freed up a few cookery books that I no longer use.
A great start, but now I'm exhausted, so it's time to stop and plan what to tackle next!
Sunday 13 September 2015
The next challenge - how do I simplify further ?
Now that I'm a couple of weeks into my project and am not buying unnecessary stuff, I've been paying some attention to what is the next challenge for me.
Our house is always messy in places, and although I'd rather have a slightly chaotic but welcoming house than one that always looked like a show home, I do find it frustrating that as the kids get older, it doesn't seem to get any easier to keep things under control. When they were small I felt like I never had enough time to keep things under control. Now they are older and I have more time, there's a limit to how much of it I want to spend on tidying up after everyone else! There are certain areas where clutter builds up and when I'm wading through it, trying to sort things out, I find myself wondering why we have so much stuff in our lives.
A while ago I remember my father telling me about my grandmother's day looking after the house and family when he was young. They lived in a in a beautiful part of the Cotswolds in Gloucestershire. My grandfather worked as the gardener on a small estate and they lived in the gardener's cottage with their three boys.
It was a small house built in the 1920's. Two rooms downstairs and three bedrooms upstairs. The toilet was originally outside, but a large porch had been built over it and the coal store, so it wasn't quite so cold to go out there in the winter. The bath was plumbed into what was called 'the scullery room' next to a sink where they washed up. It had a large piece of wood or hard board which fitted on top so you could stack up the washing up on it, when you needed a bath you just moved the board out the way. At eight every morning after breakfast my grandfather would head out to work and my grandmother would get on with the housework. I'm guessing it was physically hard, there was a Rayburn cooker that also provided hot water to light, a fireplace to clean out, and washing to be done without a modern washing machine. My grandfather came back at 11 for bread and cheese, then at 1pm for a cooked lunch. But then after, she had cleared up my father said that 'the afternoon was her own'.
I remember thinking about this when my children were younger. I could easily spend a free afternoon going through my daughter's bedroom trying to sort her numerous toys into some sort of order. My dad and his brothers had a box of wooden blocks and cars that they played with. When playtime was over, it would take a maximum of five minutes to pick this up and the room was tidy again. So in the afternoon, my grandmother didn't spend all afternoon sorting the boys bedrooms. She went to the WI, or joined in with the village amateur dramatic group, or just sat down and read a book.
It's not that I think that life was better than ours. I'm guessing there would have been times when she was bored and felt cooped up living in a small village. I don't fancy having to finish the washing up before I could have a bath or clean my teeth. But it is interesting that with all our labour saving devices, we seem to have replaced the hard work of day to day living with being busy managing all the 'stuff' in our lives: physical clutter, paperwork, emails, information. Surely there has to be a better middle way. So I'm figuring that the next challenge for me is how to simplify things further to make more time for the fun and meaningful parts of life.
Our house is always messy in places, and although I'd rather have a slightly chaotic but welcoming house than one that always looked like a show home, I do find it frustrating that as the kids get older, it doesn't seem to get any easier to keep things under control. When they were small I felt like I never had enough time to keep things under control. Now they are older and I have more time, there's a limit to how much of it I want to spend on tidying up after everyone else! There are certain areas where clutter builds up and when I'm wading through it, trying to sort things out, I find myself wondering why we have so much stuff in our lives.
A while ago I remember my father telling me about my grandmother's day looking after the house and family when he was young. They lived in a in a beautiful part of the Cotswolds in Gloucestershire. My grandfather worked as the gardener on a small estate and they lived in the gardener's cottage with their three boys.
It was a small house built in the 1920's. Two rooms downstairs and three bedrooms upstairs. The toilet was originally outside, but a large porch had been built over it and the coal store, so it wasn't quite so cold to go out there in the winter. The bath was plumbed into what was called 'the scullery room' next to a sink where they washed up. It had a large piece of wood or hard board which fitted on top so you could stack up the washing up on it, when you needed a bath you just moved the board out the way. At eight every morning after breakfast my grandfather would head out to work and my grandmother would get on with the housework. I'm guessing it was physically hard, there was a Rayburn cooker that also provided hot water to light, a fireplace to clean out, and washing to be done without a modern washing machine. My grandfather came back at 11 for bread and cheese, then at 1pm for a cooked lunch. But then after, she had cleared up my father said that 'the afternoon was her own'.
I remember thinking about this when my children were younger. I could easily spend a free afternoon going through my daughter's bedroom trying to sort her numerous toys into some sort of order. My dad and his brothers had a box of wooden blocks and cars that they played with. When playtime was over, it would take a maximum of five minutes to pick this up and the room was tidy again. So in the afternoon, my grandmother didn't spend all afternoon sorting the boys bedrooms. She went to the WI, or joined in with the village amateur dramatic group, or just sat down and read a book.
It's not that I think that life was better than ours. I'm guessing there would have been times when she was bored and felt cooped up living in a small village. I don't fancy having to finish the washing up before I could have a bath or clean my teeth. But it is interesting that with all our labour saving devices, we seem to have replaced the hard work of day to day living with being busy managing all the 'stuff' in our lives: physical clutter, paperwork, emails, information. Surely there has to be a better middle way. So I'm figuring that the next challenge for me is how to simplify things further to make more time for the fun and meaningful parts of life.
Friday 11 September 2015
When 'not buying things' leads to more shopping...
I'm just over a week into my year of not buying 'things', so time to reflect on how it's going so far.
Strangely enough, one of the conclusions is that a decision to stop buying unnecessary stuff can lead to buying more stuff in the short term, but with a more positive outcome! When I decided to set myself this challenge, it was the beginning of the summer holidays and I decided that it would be better to start from the beginning of September, once things were back to normal and the kids were heading back to school. Also we were going on holiday and it felt a bit harsh to say I wasn't allowed to buy anything while we were away. So I had a few weeks of knowing that this was the last chance to spend.
I'm pleased to report that I didn't go too overboard in those last few weeks, but it did focus my mind on all those things that I'd been meaning to do but hadn't quite got around to. For the last eight months I'd been promising myself a new pair of running shoes, but hadn't quite got around to it, as it meant setting aside some time to visit a specialist running shop. Knowing I had a deadline meant I made it it a priority, and before we went on holiday I bought my new running shoes.
Another question we'd been debating for a few months was whether to buy new blinds for the bedroom to replace the rather faded curtains and a blackout blind that wasn't working. Again, I made it a priority to visit Laura Ashley and pick up samples, and work out the cost of new blinds. In the event I decided that it would be too expensive, so in the end I bought a new black out roller blind to replace the broken one - job done. I also bought a new rotary washing line to replace the one that was falling to pieces, and ordered some bulbs for the garden to be delivered in September. Normally I get around to ordering bulbs in November, then scrambling to get them all planted before it's too late. And finally over the bank holiday weekend with the deadline looming, I ordered a new running jacket with money given to me for my birthday in the spring.
So the first conclusion that I've come to is that a decision to stop buying stuff for a year can lead to a focus on what you really should be buying in the short term. Or maybe I should conclude that normally I'm just not very efficient...
Strangely enough, one of the conclusions is that a decision to stop buying unnecessary stuff can lead to buying more stuff in the short term, but with a more positive outcome! When I decided to set myself this challenge, it was the beginning of the summer holidays and I decided that it would be better to start from the beginning of September, once things were back to normal and the kids were heading back to school. Also we were going on holiday and it felt a bit harsh to say I wasn't allowed to buy anything while we were away. So I had a few weeks of knowing that this was the last chance to spend.
I'm pleased to report that I didn't go too overboard in those last few weeks, but it did focus my mind on all those things that I'd been meaning to do but hadn't quite got around to. For the last eight months I'd been promising myself a new pair of running shoes, but hadn't quite got around to it, as it meant setting aside some time to visit a specialist running shop. Knowing I had a deadline meant I made it it a priority, and before we went on holiday I bought my new running shoes.
Another question we'd been debating for a few months was whether to buy new blinds for the bedroom to replace the rather faded curtains and a blackout blind that wasn't working. Again, I made it a priority to visit Laura Ashley and pick up samples, and work out the cost of new blinds. In the event I decided that it would be too expensive, so in the end I bought a new black out roller blind to replace the broken one - job done. I also bought a new rotary washing line to replace the one that was falling to pieces, and ordered some bulbs for the garden to be delivered in September. Normally I get around to ordering bulbs in November, then scrambling to get them all planted before it's too late. And finally over the bank holiday weekend with the deadline looming, I ordered a new running jacket with money given to me for my birthday in the spring.
So the first conclusion that I've come to is that a decision to stop buying stuff for a year can lead to a focus on what you really should be buying in the short term. Or maybe I should conclude that normally I'm just not very efficient...
Wednesday 2 September 2015
Not buying 'things' - the rules
Day 2 of my challenge of no buying 'things' for a year - what are the rules?
I've started my year of not buying 'things' - but what are the rules I've set myself? Basically it boils down to no unnecessary purchases. And no, I won't be justifying 'needing' a new dress for a party, I intend to be strict with myself, but without making life impossible.
So I can't buy clothes, shoes, bags, accessories.
No cosmetics, basic toiletries only.
No 'useful' or decorative items for the house - only essentials.
No art materials that I might do something with one day, or chairs from the dump that one day I will get around to painting....
No buying books, magazines or newspapers. I can use the library instead, or read online.
So what will I be allowed to buy?
Food obviously, medicines, basic toiletries, replacements for stuff that's broken if I can't mend it and I need it. So for example, if the washing machine breaks, or my running shoes fall to pieces, I can mend or replace them.
Cleaning materials & anything essential for house maintenance.
Fuel, tickets, experiences, holidays. 'Doing' rather than 'having'.
Necessary stationery, glue, sellotape etc. If I do actually get around to painting that chair I bought from the dump a couple of years ago, then I will try and use materials I've got, but if I run out of something essential, that's OK.
Stuff for the puppy. Having just (a few days ago) acquired a new cockapoo puppy, and not having been dog owners before, it's a bit like having a new baby and I am currently getting to grips with what is essential, and what we don't need. So rather than rushing it, there are a few things like a carrier for the car, which I know we will need but haven't bought yet.
But what about the family?
So I think that covers most things - but there is one area that is a bit more complicated. When I have mentioned to my teenage children that I might stop buying 'things' for a year, I could see a look of panic sweep across their faces. From a teenage point of view, buying 'things' isn't just about consumption, it's all about reflecting who you aspire to be. For my youngest son, his collection of 'band merch' as he calls it (T shirts with logos from obscure punk bands) and his collection of Vans shoes are highly important. My daughter loves her make up and her eclectic clothing collection which is mainly sourced from Oxfam, (so not too bad really?) So I hastened to reassure them that this is my project, not theirs. Panic was replaced by relief. But it does beg the question as how to handle birthdays and Christmas? And what about friends birthdays? I need to think about it some more, but I think I can deal with it by a combination of buying experiences rather than things, giving things I've already got or made myself, and if all else fails, teenagers love cold hard cash. That way, at least they are making their own choices and not having me buy something I think they'd love, when actually they don't.
I've started my year of not buying 'things' - but what are the rules I've set myself? Basically it boils down to no unnecessary purchases. And no, I won't be justifying 'needing' a new dress for a party, I intend to be strict with myself, but without making life impossible.
So I can't buy clothes, shoes, bags, accessories.
No cosmetics, basic toiletries only.
No 'useful' or decorative items for the house - only essentials.
No art materials that I might do something with one day, or chairs from the dump that one day I will get around to painting....
No buying books, magazines or newspapers. I can use the library instead, or read online.
So what will I be allowed to buy?
Food obviously, medicines, basic toiletries, replacements for stuff that's broken if I can't mend it and I need it. So for example, if the washing machine breaks, or my running shoes fall to pieces, I can mend or replace them.
Cleaning materials & anything essential for house maintenance.
Fuel, tickets, experiences, holidays. 'Doing' rather than 'having'.
Necessary stationery, glue, sellotape etc. If I do actually get around to painting that chair I bought from the dump a couple of years ago, then I will try and use materials I've got, but if I run out of something essential, that's OK.
Stuff for the puppy. Having just (a few days ago) acquired a new cockapoo puppy, and not having been dog owners before, it's a bit like having a new baby and I am currently getting to grips with what is essential, and what we don't need. So rather than rushing it, there are a few things like a carrier for the car, which I know we will need but haven't bought yet.
But what about the family?
So I think that covers most things - but there is one area that is a bit more complicated. When I have mentioned to my teenage children that I might stop buying 'things' for a year, I could see a look of panic sweep across their faces. From a teenage point of view, buying 'things' isn't just about consumption, it's all about reflecting who you aspire to be. For my youngest son, his collection of 'band merch' as he calls it (T shirts with logos from obscure punk bands) and his collection of Vans shoes are highly important. My daughter loves her make up and her eclectic clothing collection which is mainly sourced from Oxfam, (so not too bad really?) So I hastened to reassure them that this is my project, not theirs. Panic was replaced by relief. But it does beg the question as how to handle birthdays and Christmas? And what about friends birthdays? I need to think about it some more, but I think I can deal with it by a combination of buying experiences rather than things, giving things I've already got or made myself, and if all else fails, teenagers love cold hard cash. That way, at least they are making their own choices and not having me buy something I think they'd love, when actually they don't.
Tuesday 1 September 2015
The first challenge - not buying 'things' for a year
OK, so we'll start with the biggie.
Starting today, 1st September, for a year - no more buying 'things' that aren't essential. No more clothes, make up, shoes, things for the house, things that might come in useful, things that are a bargain. No more charity shop finds, no more browsing in White Stuff, no more googling on Amazon or Ebay.
To be fair to me - I'm not a spendaholic. (Or am I just in denial?) I see myself more as a modern day hunter-gatherer. I'm always on the look out for bargains, quirky dresses, stuff that might be useful, stuff that someone else doesn't want that I might have a use for. (Now I'm sounding like a hoarder...) I love charity shops and volunteer in Oxfam which is great fun and has the added advantage of getting a good look at everything in stock once a week. And given that it's a charity I feel passionate about, I can always justify a purchase. ("Well if I don't wear it, it counts as a donation to Oxfam anyway...") With three children, the ability to sniff out Boden dresses and dungarees for £3.50 at the local NCT sale has been of huge benefit when the children were young. Not only were they colorfully dressed, but I really didn't care if chocolate ice cream got spilt down the front. But I have come to the point where enough is enough. It's time to reign it in for a bit.
So why - what are my reasons for this challenge?
The first and most obvious reason for me is that I'm a bit of a greenie. I am concerned about climate change and the embedded emissions in all the 'stuff' we consume and even setting that aside, I don't think we can carry on using up the world's resources at the rate we are going. But given my love of dress-hunting, I have a bit of a conflict going on. So I think it would be good to challenge myself to step out of my little hamster shopping wheel, and to just do without for a bit, to give that bargain-hunting instinct a bit of a rest.
Secondly, after 16 years of children and 13 years in our current house, we've got rather a lot of stuff. Not being the organized super-mum type, I always struggle with tidying up and keeping on top of the house, so it does occur to me that if we had a bit less stuff, it might be a bit easier. For years when the children were young, I blamed my untidiness on not having enough time, but now I have more time, I find I actually don't want to spend all my life tidying up after 3 teenagers, and I'd really like to tidy less and get out more. So maybe if I stopped buying, and continued decluttering, it might actually help.
The third reason is both more subtle and more profound. As a psychology graduate and mother, I have spent a lot of time over the last few years thinking and reading about what makes us happy, healthy and well adjusted. There's a lot of evidence that money spent on experiences makes us happier than money spent on things, so I want to try that out and see if it's true. So I'm not necessarily aiming to save money,although it will be interesting to see how a change in spending habits affects the bottom line. But rather, I would like to readjust my attention on to doing rather than having. It will be interesting to see what difference it makes - will I feel happier? Will not buying things free up more time for other activities?
So - that's the challenge ! Next time I will set out the rules, but for now I have my challenge and my reasons for doing it. And lastly, I'm amused by the comment that my lovely fellow Oxfam volunteer made to our manager - "A year? She won't manage more than a couple of months..."
Starting today, 1st September, for a year - no more buying 'things' that aren't essential. No more clothes, make up, shoes, things for the house, things that might come in useful, things that are a bargain. No more charity shop finds, no more browsing in White Stuff, no more googling on Amazon or Ebay.
To be fair to me - I'm not a spendaholic. (Or am I just in denial?) I see myself more as a modern day hunter-gatherer. I'm always on the look out for bargains, quirky dresses, stuff that might be useful, stuff that someone else doesn't want that I might have a use for. (Now I'm sounding like a hoarder...) I love charity shops and volunteer in Oxfam which is great fun and has the added advantage of getting a good look at everything in stock once a week. And given that it's a charity I feel passionate about, I can always justify a purchase. ("Well if I don't wear it, it counts as a donation to Oxfam anyway...") With three children, the ability to sniff out Boden dresses and dungarees for £3.50 at the local NCT sale has been of huge benefit when the children were young. Not only were they colorfully dressed, but I really didn't care if chocolate ice cream got spilt down the front. But I have come to the point where enough is enough. It's time to reign it in for a bit.
So why - what are my reasons for this challenge?
The first and most obvious reason for me is that I'm a bit of a greenie. I am concerned about climate change and the embedded emissions in all the 'stuff' we consume and even setting that aside, I don't think we can carry on using up the world's resources at the rate we are going. But given my love of dress-hunting, I have a bit of a conflict going on. So I think it would be good to challenge myself to step out of my little hamster shopping wheel, and to just do without for a bit, to give that bargain-hunting instinct a bit of a rest.
Secondly, after 16 years of children and 13 years in our current house, we've got rather a lot of stuff. Not being the organized super-mum type, I always struggle with tidying up and keeping on top of the house, so it does occur to me that if we had a bit less stuff, it might be a bit easier. For years when the children were young, I blamed my untidiness on not having enough time, but now I have more time, I find I actually don't want to spend all my life tidying up after 3 teenagers, and I'd really like to tidy less and get out more. So maybe if I stopped buying, and continued decluttering, it might actually help.
The third reason is both more subtle and more profound. As a psychology graduate and mother, I have spent a lot of time over the last few years thinking and reading about what makes us happy, healthy and well adjusted. There's a lot of evidence that money spent on experiences makes us happier than money spent on things, so I want to try that out and see if it's true. So I'm not necessarily aiming to save money,although it will be interesting to see how a change in spending habits affects the bottom line. But rather, I would like to readjust my attention on to doing rather than having. It will be interesting to see what difference it makes - will I feel happier? Will not buying things free up more time for other activities?
So - that's the challenge ! Next time I will set out the rules, but for now I have my challenge and my reasons for doing it. And lastly, I'm amused by the comment that my lovely fellow Oxfam volunteer made to our manager - "A year? She won't manage more than a couple of months..."
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